Who is Alphabeat?

I love music.  It can do incredible things to me from lifting me up from the depths of darkness to making me giddy with joy.  It helps me travel instantly to a place and time only found in my memories and it creates unique new experiences that I'll think back on for years to come.

Here's a band and song that I'd never heard of before yesterday.  I really like it and wanted to share it with you.  What do you think?

Alphabeat - The Spell (Live)

Team Coco

I've always liked Conan O'Brien even though his show was on too late for me to watch. So when I found out what NBC was doing I was definitely on his side. The up side of the NBC debacle has been a lot of hilarious late night bits including this interview with Adam Sandler. (OK, so they've taken the videos down so I can't play it or the last episode of Conan.  Did you see it?  Wow, it was so great.  Conan is a class act.  I just found this great video montage instead!)





What do you think of the Leno/Conan thing? Are you team Coco?

Party In The USA - Or Rather on Fire Island!

I've been dying to post this video ever since Kate showed it to me a few days ago.  It is hilarious!

We watched it together and laughed until we were crying.

Even though Miley Cyrus bugs me, I love this song and turn it up in my car whenever it's on the radio.  I sing the lyrics out loud and turn to my boys and give them a big mommy laugh (mostly because I think I'm hilarious when I'm singing and dancing in the car).  And when she says in the song "so I put my hands up.." I raise my hands high and say "come on boys, raise your hands and dance with mommy!"  They just laugh at me.  I think I should probably get used to that.

Watch, enjoy and put your hands up!  :)

A Little Andre Goes A Long Way!

I just finished Andre Agassi's book Open. It was interesting. I don't really follow tennis but I really enjoyed reading his journey through life. It includes some really gritty stuff, including a lot of self loathing and depression (which I can identify with to a certain degree) and also redemption and joy at finding his true self (something I'm always working towards.)

Here are a few interviews that I enjoyed watching:







His stories about how he found the love of his life, Steffi Graff and also how he founded his school were really romantic and uplifting!!!

Have you read the book?

Sharing A Smile

I love life sometimes.

The kind of love that fills your whole body with tingles. When you can't stop smiling and you don't even know why.

The last few days I've been filled with a kind of joy that is surprising. I think entering the Christmas season definitely has something to do with it but it's not all.

It also has to do with taking chances.  Taking chances on people. Opening yourself and your heart to strangers and seeing them surprise you by returning your kindness.  Seeing the good in people and the power of kindness.

I'm glad that I'm still able to do that. Even with my cynicism and sometimes jaded attitude about the world, once in a while I let my guard down and am surprised by the goodness of people and the world.

I send you a big smile and hug!

:)

An Indescribable Love

Sometimes I can't believe how much I love my kids.

It's not like any kind of love that I have known before. Nothing compares to it, not the love for my parents, siblings or husband.

And that's not an easy thing to say because I love these other people in my life dearly. But it's true.

It's a kind of love that is truly frighting because it consumes me entirely. Sometimes when they're in my arms or I look at them I wonder how this kind of feeling is possible. It's indescribable.

With this kind of attachment, however, comes a heavy burden. The burden of a parent. The worry, the suffering for their suffering, the paralyzing fear of the what-ifs, the heart wrenching ache in the core of your being when the bad times comes for them.

But there is also the joy that you feel at the smallest moments, their smile, their happiness, their success, their feeling of safety when they're in your arms.

Sometimes I think my heart can't take it, like it will erupt from the pressure of what I feel for them. But I'm also so grateful for that feeling.

It makes me feel more alive than I do at any other moment in my life.

When I'm Most Happy

I've been thinking a lot about happiness the last few weeks. About what truly makes me happy. The kind of happiness that brings peace. That makes you feel calm inside. Content. Centered. Solid.

So what can bring me this kind of happiness? The question has baffled me over the years. Many times I thought I'd found it. That one thing that makes me happy and fills me up. Finding a man that loves me and I love. Yes that did and still does make me happy. Being successful. Making money. Being creatively challenged. Getting to a place where I'm happy with my body. Yes, all these make me happy (when I can achieve them from time to time) and are all wonderful in their own way.

But I still have those nagging doubts that pop up once in a while and keep me from feeling at peace with myself. Maybe that is just life. The good and the bad. The ying and the yang. Maybe I'm destined to never truly feel the kind of calm that I only see in beautiful old paintings.

Or that's what I thought until recently. I've realized that the time that I feel the most calm, self assured, fulfilled, centered is when I am being the kind of mother that I'm proud of. When I love my children, take care of them, be with them, grow with them, and sacrifice for them the way that I am proud of.

That is the time that I am most happy.